Staying calm in the middle of chaos when you have screaming and crying kids is SO tough! Trust me when I tell you, I have been there! At one point in time, I had 4 kids all under the age of 5! I have had my share of screaming kids, and there were days I wanted to run out of my house and down the street, as my mom used to say! Ha Ha My mom also used to say, if someone says MOM one more time, I’m changing my name! As a child, I would always wonder what in the world would she change her name to?? And where would she go if she ran down the street?? As a parent, it’s always good to know you are not the only one who has these feelings, and it doesn't make you a bad parent!
One of the main things I learned with my 4 boys was that when I felt that way, I would try to take 5 minutes to myself if possible. Even amid chaos, walking away for 5 minutes won’t hurt anything if the kids are all physically safe. Taking 5 will give you a moment to take some deep breaths so you can feel balanced again. I know you are probably thinking it’s easier said than done. Yes, sometimes it is, but if you do accomplish the time by yourself for rebalancing, you will find it to be well worth the effort.
Another approach that worked for me is when the kids went for a nap, I would take full advantage of the “ME TIME”. Now I would not get to have “ME TIME” every day, but I did try to do it when I felt I just needed that extra time for myself, and I had rough days, or should I say days with an 'S'! I would enjoy sitting on the couch watching my favorite TV show. Your time might be more along the lines of taking a bubble bath or painting your fingernails. We all have different things that work for us, and it doesn’t matter what that looks like as long as we take the time when we can. Sometimes the laundry would just have to wait. After all, it wasn’t going anywhere, so why not, right?
I remember so vividly one day when my twins and oldest son were fighting. At that very moment, I was nursing my newborn baby with tears streaming down my face as I watched my oldest three running and screaming. I’m not sure exactly why I was crying, other than I felt overwhelmed and was just getting adjusted to our latest addition to our family. Keep in mind, the older three kids were 3, 3, and 5 years old. If I am going to be honest with you, I had several moments like that! I just wish I had someone to reassure me that I wasn’t alone, and I was going to come out on the other side with a happy family of 6!
I look back now and think I wouldn’t change a moment, and I made it through! We had a few bumps in the road, but it was worth it! Just remember to TAKE 5 whenever you can to help you through your moments of chaos! Find another mom who is going through the same thing or has been through it and can share some wisdom! You will be glad you did!